Science Says, Suck It, E-readers!

I just read an article about how reading an actual, physical book will turn you into a smarty-smarty pants. This makes me giddy as fuck. I’ve always been a big advocate for the printed word and now…science sides with paper, mofos. 

“Reading in print helps with comprehension,” the article states. Kindles and digital books and your laptop screen screw up your processing skills. Dig it? Going old-school analog with the paperbacks reduces stress, increases concentration & empathy, and improves sleep. So get down with your bad, book-lovin’ self. Nab 30-45 minutes and bust out a paperback. “BUT,” you whine, “I have no time.” “There’s always time,” I crow, tossing a plethora of suggestions on where you can pop a squat and break into a book. 

Don't be this girl.

Don’t be this girl.

  • While getting a pedicure
  • Waiting for the doctor
  • On the crapper
  • During dinner if you’re alone, bored or just rude
  • Waiting in line
  • While taking public transit
  • In the bathtub
  • While nursing
  • During your lunch break
  • In your car before a meeting/work
  • During really bad sex
  • At the pool
  • Passenger bound on a road trip

This means be prepared. Carry a book on you at all times. Sure, it’s more cumbersome than an e-reader, but there’s nothing like the feel of paper in your hand and the whiff of fluttery pages. Wait — or am I the only one who gets turned on by these things?

Anyway…

I hold no grudges against e-readers. And at least you’re reading. That’s better than 23% of American adults. I just like to give the good ol’ book it’s goddamn due. Hey, paper’s gonna take you through the zombie apocalypse; your e-reader’s battery will only last so long.

Because, science.

2 Comments
  • Reply

    wanderingviolet

    August 23, 2015 at 8:41 pm

    I am a hardcore ebook reader.*wide eyes*
    It’s more comfortable for me. I don’t like holding a book in my hand for long stretches of time,when my almost weightless phone can do the work. I know. Most people like actual,physical books. I?Not so much. :/

  • Reply

    Christina Yeager

    August 24, 2015 at 1:59 pm

    I always wondered about this (if there was a difference between a paperback and e-book). I know an e-book would make my life much easier, but I love the smell of a good book! Very interesting read, thank you Jules! And….love Greg Kelly. What a genius

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